Returning to Tomar, Portugal
- Lisa Tisdale
- Aug 3
- 9 min read
Updated: Aug 13
In search of Peace in rural Portugal
After a second month of back-to-back AirBNB-sponsored chaos, I was ready to wipe the slate clean and try life in Tomar. Along the way I encountered some road-trip chaos after which I arrived at my apartment to find it was the site of a recent rager.
A Fresh Start in Tomar
With Aveiro and all its negativity behind me, I was excited as the train made its way toward the rural town of Tomar. Surely, this stop was to be my lucky charm after my first lovely night there many years ago. For reasons I cannot quite pinpoint, that night was one that remains in the forefront when I think back to my favorite travel memories. Nothing extremely special happened. I simply had a nice evening in a quaint town after a long day of travel.
Now I was heading back to try life in the tiny town with its 20,000 residents. That may not seem tiny to many, but compared to my former home of NYC, it seemed small to me.
If It Weren't for Bad Luck I'd Have No Luck at All
As the train was getting closer to Tomar, it made a stop at a rural town that did not look to have much going for it. Some announcement I could not translate blared over the loudspeaker after which everyone left the train. I followed and quickly learned the train was being taken out of service. The exact departure time for the next train heading to Tomar was not clear but it was certain to be a long wait.
As I stood there trying to figure out my next move, the locals, mostly men sitting in plastic chairs outside the only café in sight, watched me curiously. Not knowing the best next step, I headed toward the café to consider my options.
When I entered, I found myself in a massive space that seemed to be a combination café and dumping ground for a very eclectic mix of fascinating, albeit dusty artifacts from times past. In the middle of these mementos was a boat with a tiled wall rising out of the center surrounded by jade plants. If these objects could talk, I’d be the first to listen to what was sure to be interesting stories of life in days past.
The old woman behind the counter moved so slowly she reminded me of a lady back in my NYC neighborhood who was still bartending at 85 years young. It might take 15 minutes to get a drink but the built-in delay meant you never ran the risk of drinking too much or running up a huge bar tab.
This woman was operating on a similar schedule. She slowly and patiently came over to take my order, before shuffling back to the other end of the counter to make my espresso. I was tempted to find a room in town, if there even was a hotel, and stay here for a night. Towns like these, seemingly stuck in time, intrigue me. I love older people and places as they have the best stories to tell.
We Hit a Dead End
Resisting my urge to stray off course, I used all of my ride hailing apps in search of a way to Tomar. After numerous drivers cancelled on me, one finally agreed to come rescue me. He seemed nice enough and was about my age, but my Portuguese mostly failed me when I tried to chat with him. So I sat back and enjoyed watching the countryside pass by as we made our way to Tomar.
Suddenly, we turned down a country road that, while Tomar is a bit remote, seemed too far off the beaten path. As the road narrowed, we arrived at a dead end.
Great. What do you have in store for me now, travel gods/demons?
If This is Where It All Ends…
I looked up ahead and saw a group of people standing on a terrace on the back of a house staring at us. Of course my mind immediately went to dark places, wondering if they were in on a scheme with my driver to bring me here. Why had my driver come this far out for this crappy fare? As my mind drifted further into dark corners, an angry dog took up residence by my car door and was making it well-known that my presence was not welcome.
My driver tried in vain to consult his map app while I tried to rid my mind of the scary thoughts and focus on the good times I’d had in my life. If this was where it was all to end in some bizarre rural criminal conspiracy, then I wanted to go out holding close the memories of better times.
Finally, my driver gave up on finding directions on his map app as I guess his phone had lost signal as mine had. We drove back in the direction we came from with the angry dog following us for some time, seemingly to make sure we left his neighborhood.
When we got back to the main road, we drove for a bit, finally seeing signs to Tomar. Relieved and with service restored to my phone, I confirmed the driving time to Tomar was short and focused on my next stop.
Finally in Tomar!
As we drove into Tomar, I easily recognized the town and knew exactly how to reach my apartment. I thanked the driver and resisted the urge to suggest he get a more reliable GPS when I remembered how many drivers cancelled my rural pickup before he came to my rescue.
Arriving at the apartment my first impressions were generally positive. Sure, the huge balcony looked like a bunch of drunks had a wild party, leaving wine corks and ceramic pieces from a broken vase scattered all over the ground by the umbrella that used to provide shade for the table. But hey, no signs of mold, or massive construction projects so definitely an improvement over Aveiro and Porto.
Next, I headed inside to inspect the bedroom and noticed the nasty floor mats on either side of the bed. I could get those cleaned or do without them. Still no major problems. Yet.
The Nail in the Coffin of Another AirBNB-Sponsored Disaster!
After going to the market and buying some things to make dinner, I was pulling some silverware out of the drawer and noticed the tray, on top of being dirty, had pills scattered amongst the cutlery. Thinking about the rough time I’d been through I considered my options. I’d never tried drugs before but there is a first time for everything. Based on the looks of the balcony, someone had a helluva time here before I arrived. Maybe these pills had been their ticket to paradise.
Tabling a decision on the pills, I opened another drawer and grabbed a pan. I noticed something wriggling under the plastic drawer liner. Of course it was a worm, trying to find freedom. It was surrounded by the decayed worm carcasses of its friends who had perished before it, trying to make a similar escape. I smushed the plastic on top of the worm, sending it to be with its friends and slammed the drawer.
I messaged the owner and told her about the trashed balcony, the worm fest in the kitchen drawers, and the nasty floor mats by the bed. I did not mention the pills as I had not decided yet what I might do with those. She apologized and said she’d have the couple that manages the place come by and clean up.
One man came the next day and stayed all of 3-4 minutes in which he swept up the some of the broken glass on the balcony, shoved the umbrella in the outdoor closet, wiped the dead worm carcasses with a dry paper towel and shook the dirty mats over the balcony and put them back by the bed.
I gave up as I swore off any future engagements with AirBNB. First, I scrubbed the plastic liner and the bottom of the worm drawer with disinfectant, ridding it of worm guts and carcasses. I washed every pot, pan and storage container I might use and put those items in the drawer I cleaned. I washed one knife, one fork and one spoon and put them in a clean cup on the counter. Outside, I pulled the umbrella out of the closet and installed it in the center of the table on the balcony. Once again, I piled the dirty bedroom mats by the door. Each week, the couple in charge of cleaning the apartment came and cleaned, if you can call it that, and put the same, dirty mats back by the bed. When they left, I would just pile them back by the door.
I never let AirBNB know what happened as doing so would be a complete and total waste of my time.
There Was a Silver Lining in Tomar
Despite all my misfortunes in this, the last of three terrible apartments I’d found through the now dead-to-me AirBNB, I was happy in Tomar. After cleaning the apartment to my very high standards (how dare I want a worm-free drawer!), I found it was quite perfect for me. I had views of the old castle and convent on the hill just above me from the balcony. I could cook simple meals by sticking to the areas I’d cleaned in the kitchen. During the day, I worked at the table which I pushed in front of the balcony door so I could enjoy the view of the castle and monastery.
My Morning Café in Tomar
I quickly chose my favorite morning spot, a one minute walk from my apartment. It was a bit “modern” for a typical Portuguese café and sold lottery cards and tickets which kept things hopping morning, noon, and night. In the morning, there were frequently older ladies buying scratch cards and in the afternoon and evening the men drank a few beers while they tested their lottery luck.
In the café, there were coveted seats along the back wall and I would gravitate towards those if empty. One morning, I found myself headed to one of those seats at the same time as an older man. I backed off, and ceded the seat to him. As an immigrant, I prefer to blend into the wallpaper than bully a local out of his favorite seat. He smiled and thanked me, trying to have a conversation that exceeded my language limits. I saw him there many times after that and he always chatted with me, being patient with me as I attempted to learn his language.
Easy Living in Tomar
My routine was easy in Tomar. Since everything was close, I had more time for the little things. In the early mornings, I did yoga and then went for my morning coffee and Portuguese practice at my café. After working a few hours, I’d make lunch at home, work some more and then head off for an afternoon break of reading in a different café, also a one-minute walk from the apartment. My afternoon café was in a bookstore, which made it the perfect setting for diving into a good book while drinking a coffee.
After my reading break, I’d head back to the apartment to work a bit longer. I would either go out to eat or make dinner in the evenings and then take a walk around town. I loved walking across the little bridge to the other side of town and back. If there was a football game on, I’d stop in Café Paraiso, and grab a table. I always think back to when I sat in that café 10 years ago and was slipped a sweet note by an attractive guy that expressed his affection for me. While I found the note as lovely as the guy who wrote it, It was hard to see our future together as neither of us spoke the other’s language.
As I did the first time I was in Tomar, I loved the town and had a wonderfully simple time there.
My Perfect Life
How things had changed since that first trip to Tomar. The things that excited me then still do, however, I find more joy in simply living daily life. On this journey, I have derived greater pleasure out of finding a routine in a new place and getting to know a few locals, than seeing every sight recommended in the guide book. I suppose that is wisdom in a way or at least, for me, personal growth.
In the future, my life may not always be filled with excitement and new things to see. But if there is one thing this trip around Portugal is teaching me is that I find joy in daily life and the people that share it with me in ways I never expected.
That is pretty close to a perfect life for me.
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